Why I Still Believe in Marriage

Why I Still Believe in Marriage

 This post is part of the Happy Wives Club Blog Tour which I am delighted to be a part of along with hundreds of inspiring bloggers. To learn more and join us, CLICK HERE! 

Fawn Weaver, the founder of the Happy Wives Club wrote a book about the best marriage secrets the world has to offer. They say the book is like “Eat, Pray, Love meets The 5 Love Languages.” I say the book is inspiring. You can grab a copy HERE.

We were sitting in the dining room of a timeshare in Florida after hearing the devastating news that my parents had gotten a divorce, and my husband said the most important words to me, after our marriage vows of course. He grabbed my hand and said, “We will never do this. I will not divorce you.” He touched my wedding ring and said. “This is forever.”

In a society and culture where the term marriage is used loosely and there’s always an out, my wedding ring is a reminder that this is forever. I won’t pretend that 12 years of marriage and 4 years of knowingly struggling with infertility was easy. There have been hard times. Tension between us that you could cut like a knife. Going to sleep with a tear-drenched pillow as silent tears fell from my eyes.

It hasn’t been easy, but no one said that it would be. Movies and television shows make marriage seem all lollipops and daisies, but that’s not reality. Marriage is made up of two sinners in need of a Savior. We need Jesus. Without Him, doing it on our own, we are destined to fail. And we do.

Marriage is a picture of Christ’s relationship to the Church, and his love for her. Paul instructs us in Ephesians 5:25-27, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the Church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that he might present the Church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.” This is what our marriages are to look like. Two sinners are to meet each other in the scary, dark places of our brokenness, our fear, pain, anger, rebellion, and we are to show the world Christ’s love. It is Christ who brings beauty to our mess.

Some days are hard. Especially when you learn about hidden sin and your soul is crushed. Your heart literally aches in pain as it beats within your chest. But God is bigger than that sin and that moment. God has a plan and a purpose. He wants to show the world His love for us. He wants the world to see His redemption in action. We are His hands and His feet even in those dark moments. The world is waiting and watching to see our reaction.

When we are weak, He is strong. He mends the broken. He makes beauty from ashes. He restores what was lost. We are merely clay jars in the hands of a mighty Potter. The fire of marriage is refining.

But that is what makes it beautiful.

So if you’re reading this and you’ve given up on your marriage, take a step back. Put aside the emotions, and remember why you fell in love in the first place. Plan a date night and talk. Not just the easy, surface conversations, but really get to the heart. Communication is crucial is any relationship, but definitely in the marriage relationship. It’s not too late. It’s never too late. You don’t have to walk this road alone. Keep fighting the good fight.

Let’s commit to making our husband’s a priority this year.

 

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  1. Well said, Whitney. Marriage is not easy. I think most people forget that a marriage involves two people with two different personalities, likes, dislikes etc. A couple has to work hard to mesh all of these things. I think if people would realize that disagreements are normal in any relationship and you are going to get on each other’s nerves occasionally. What makes a marriage last is forgiveness, grace and a relationship with our savior, Jesus Christ. Thank you for sharing and for the encouragement.

    • Thanks for stopping by, friend! I love this, “What makes a marriage last is forgiveness, grace and a relationship with our savior, Jesus Christ.” Amen.

  2. What a beautiful and heartfelt post! I love this, “remember why you fell in love in the first place” and firmly believe that remembering, every day is one of the secrets to a happy marriage. When you remember it’s easier to trust, talk and laugh. When you forget, it can be almost impossible. Thanks so much for joining the Blog Tour!

    • Thanks for stopping by, Maggie! I think we can get so caught up in the current situation/struggle and forget that all important point. We all have to work at marriage, and if we don’t remember why we fell in love in the first place, it’s easier to think the situation is hopeless.

  3. Brittany

    8 January

    Absolutely beautiful post! Marriage is hard, but it is very, very worth it. It’s just sad too many people don’t realize that.

  4. Gabrielle

    11 January

    Beautifully said, as always, Whitney. My parents are divorced too.

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