Me Monday

My Story

Mondays won’t always be about me, that would be boring. But we all have a story to tell. God wrote each of our stories in a unique way so that we can help each other. We weren’t made to live alone. We were made to first and foremost worship our Lord, but we were also made to live in community. So here’s part of my story. 

I went to church from birth until about Kindergarten but I don’t remember much except some of the Bible stories. When I was in the sixth grade I begged my parents to start taking us to church.

I knew I was missing something, but I didn’t know what.

I remember sitting in a youth group meeting with middle and high schoolers and my friend telling everyone that I didn’t know if I was saved or not. I about died. Later, the Youth Minister asked me if I wanted to talk and I said sure. I figured he wanted to talk about ways to bring in more middle schoolers. We walked over to the offices and he got the Pastor. Then they brought my Dad in the room. I was so confused and seriously thought I was in trouble. The Pastor knelt down in front of me and prayed “The Sinners Prayer.” They all told me how proud they were of me and we scheduled my baptism. I was speechless. But this shy, quiet, people pleaser wasn’t about to burst their bubble and tell them I didn’t have a clue what they were talking about. I had a meeting with the baptism coordinator and she asked me if I knew about the symbolism of baptism. Nope. Sure didn’t. And yet she still let me continue. But at least know I knew that baptism symbolized the death and resurrection of Christ. Even if I didn’t understand why. So I was baptized and went along in life thinking I was “saved” but feeling unsettled about the whole thing at the same time.

Thankfully in God sovereignty, He sent a very special youth minister to our church. I was even on the committee that hired him. He and his wife taught me what it really meant to be saved. That being a Believer was more than praying a pray and being baptized. Of course those things were important and part of it, but if you didn’t know who Jesus was in the first place, that’s a huge problem. At Summer Camp one night I knew I needed to officially make it right. I had to do the hardest thing this shy, people pleaser had ever done at this point in her life. I had to tell our Youth Pastors wife that I didn’t think I was really a Believer. No. That I wasn’t a Believer. Although I had checked off everything I was supposed to do, I didn’t know the true meaning when I did it. I started bawling. Big ugly tears. Sobs. She didn’t know what was wrong and I was having a hard time with words. Eventually I got it all out. She was shocked but understanding. We went through the Roman Road and I prayed to the Lord confessing that I was a sinner in need of His grace and mercy. Thanking Him for sending Jesus to die on the cross for my sins. Confessing that He alone is Lord and Savior. It was so freeing. Now I knew that I was a Believer.

Of course we came back from camp and not long after our Youth pastor left. I asked the new Youth Pastor if he thought I should be baptized again. He said no. It wasn’t necessary. But the unsettled feeling was back. I couldn’t shake it. I knew that I needed to be baptized again. The first time wasn’t a real display of my salvation. Haha! I didn’t even know what it meant that first time. But no one seemed concerned. Just me.

It wasn’t until we moved to North Carolina to attend SEBTS that we found a solid church home who believed with me that I needed to be baptized again. So I was. I bawled through my testimony. Sobs. But I was baptized in Falls Lake to symbolize the death and resurrection of Christ. What a glorious day that was!

Finally.

I would absolutely love to hear your story. Please link up in the comments or feel free to share your story below. I can’t wait to see how God is writing your story.

 


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  1. For 38 years, I too knew something was wrong. I just thought I could fill in the spaces myself! I was into new age stuff, eastern religion, astrology, I Ching… I had gone to church at least two times a year when I was a kid, but the whole family got lazy about that. Plus, none of us was really going for the right reason. It was just “the thing to do”. But I’d ask the grownups, “WHO is the Holy Spirit?!” They would try to explain God the Father and Jesus the Son to me… I could almost wrap my head around those two, but the Holy Ghost eluded me. (And no one seemed able to explain Him…) Of course that was because it’s not a head thing- it’s a heart thing! But even as a youngster, I was quite the intellectual. So I just couldn’t figure it out.

    But eventually (at 38 years old), some funky, rather unmanageable stuff came up in my life; I realized I really wanted to connect with God, and PRAY. I somehow realized I needed that “go-between”. I needed the Holy Spirit. A co-worker had been on my case about Christianity, so I’d been fending her off by telling her, “Yes, I KNOW Jesus died for my sins. Yes I KNOW I’m a sinner. Yes I AM a Christian.” But when I needed to pray, I felt like I wasn’t quite “in the club”. So… I prayed to God, asking for the Holy Spirit. He GAVE it to me! I started speaking in tongues, in a sort of musical prayer, as I stood at the stove making dinner. I’m pretty sure God wanted to give me something to confirm that this didn’t come from me. And this unknown language certainly didn’t come from me! So I finally got it. I was completely transformed. Night and day.

    Thankfully, my high school sweetheart, rebel comrade, hippie style, non-believing husband also got saved in the following six months- thank you LORD! At one point, in tears again (as this had become a common thing for me now), I begged my husband to just, “Confess that Jesus is Lord and you will be saved”. My husband said he could not say that, as he didn’t KNOW Jesus is Lord. But, after a bit more time, and many more prayers later, he did also get saved. The kids had easily come to Christ (not as much baggage with them?). And now we could all be so blessed, knowing that One True God, having Jesus Christ as our Savior. We continue on, almost twenty years later, serving the Lord. Praise God.

    Loved YOUR story too, Whitney. Thanks for sharing it!

  2. Lou Ann

    12 June

    I stumbled onto your site today looking for something else. I want to thank you for sharing your story and your awesome testimony. I praise God that He continued to speak to your heart and mind and helped you see your need for Him. May God bless you as you reach out to others and help them to understand what being a Believe in Jesus really is, a personal relationship.

    I was raised in a pastor’s home and accepted Christ at an early age. Then I grew up and married a pastor. Actually he was in college for music education but the Lord took us down a different road. A year after our one and only child was born premature and taken home to be with the Lord 3 days later, we were headed to seminary. And I have loved every minute of it, well, not every minute, but I do love the work the Lord has called me and my husband to. Even in the midst of difficult times there is joy unspeakable that comes from the Father above. There is no greater joy in serving the Lord and knowing that we are making a difference in the life of someone.

    I can look back over the past 34 years and thank the Lord for all the lessons I have learned about Him as He walked with us through some very discouraging times. I can honestly say He knows what is best for His children. I have grown in ways I can’t explain and my love for the Lord is so much greater today and grows greater every day I have breath.

    My motto in life, “Please God, not man.”

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